Ten Questions I Can’t Wait to be Answered Saturday

1.) If Michigan beats Notre Dame in the big house and no one is there to see it, does it really happen?

2.) If Florida International and Miami brawl again this year, will anyone really care? Will it even make it on Sportscenter?

3.) Can Central Florida beat #6 Texas? I’m not saying Texas is going to lose, I’m just saying it’s a strong possibility and nobody is talking about it. Texas is the consensus #6 team but has yet to look like it. The Longhorns looked way below average in a squeaker win against Arkansas State and beat TCU last week with an asterisk- stats and score look pretty good but TCU also turned it over four times and had 13 penalties for 100 yards. Next comes word that Texas Senior Safety Tyrell Gatewood and another player were arrested Wednesday and charged with two counts of drug possession. Good time to go on the road out of conference? Probably not. Hard to tell at this point if UCF is any good; they beat NC State in their first game on the road, but that was an NC State team without the services of Chuck Amato and his space goggles. Central Florida had a bye week so they’ll be really ready….errr something like that.

4.) When is Nick Saban going to bust out the hounds-tooth hat? You know he’s going to at some point. I also want to know how many hair stylists he’ll keep on the sideline after he decides to take the hat off. Does he wear the hat to bed each night? Along with his red satin ‘Bama pj’s?

5.) Between Louisville and Kentucky tomorrow- who can get to 50 the quickest?

6.) After drilling Mississippi State 45-0 and Virginia Tech 48-7, can LSU actually get Middle Tennessee State into negative points? I’m sure it’s possible, I’m just not that good at math.

7.) When Duke travels to Northwestern Saturday, which fans will be able to come up with the more clever “…..you’ll work for us someday” cheers?

8.) How quickly will Cornhusker fans call for Bill Callahan’s job after they lose to USC tomorrow? Sorry Nebraska nation, unless USC leaves their pads in LA, you’re still not quite ready for the big win.

9.) If Tennessee can keep Florida’s offense in check, can their offense score enough points to pull off the upset?

10.) Notre Dame has averaged 133 yards per game of offense (-4 rushing, 137 passing). Michigan has given up an average of 505.5 yards on defense (260 passing, 245.5 rushing). Can you spell inept with an ND or a UM? Can Michigan come up with any kind of a pass rush to fluster QB Ron Powlus errrrrrr Jimmy Clausen? If you put the secondaries together between Notre Dame and Michigan, could that unit start for any team in the top 25?

Bonus question: Beano Cook picked Notre Dame and Auburn to play for the national title last year. If I live for 100 more years, will I ever see that game happen. Ever?