Red’s been traveling a lot lately so we haven’t been able to pay as much attention to the blogosphere as we need to. Things are back to neutral so hopefully that means blogging fun.
Speaking of travel, we’ve got a couple ‘o tips for anyone flying the friendly skies in the next couple months.
Tip # 1: If you are sick, stay off my plane. If you’ve just got a little cold or some slight sneezing, that’s cool, but you better wear a particulate mask- you know the ones all the Chinese were sporting during the summer of SARS? Seriously, my kids are bringing home enough germs from school, I don’t need to breathe in your re-circulated sick germs for three hours on an airplane while I try to siphon the last peanut bit out of the 1″ by 1″ bag that was my lunch.
Tip # 2: This is a pretty simple one. The plane has landed and made its way to the gate. The little bell goes off and everyone unbuckles their seat belts. Do you a.) immediately stand up in the aisle and try to move forward in the plane a couple of rows or b.) play it cool like Vincent Vega? The answer, of course, is “B”. The deplaning rules are very simple America- handicapped folks and people continuing on the same plane stay where they’re sitting. Everyone else should leave the plane according to where you’re sitting. If I’m in row 13 and you’re in row 14, you’re standing in row 14 until all of the passengers from row 13 have vacated their seats and started moving toward the front of the plane. You do not start to edge your way forward and act like you have a right to get off the germbox before I do. It’s douchebaggery and it’s punishable by a forearm shiver to the temple or a toe sticking juuuuuuust a smidge too far out in the aisle. You’ve been warned.
Now on to the news desk…
Dateline: Goslar, Germany
According to the Universal Press Syndicate, a restaurant owner has come up with a creative way to get around the recently imposed smoking ban. The owner made three holes in an outer wall so that smokers can stick their head and arms through the openings and toke it while not actually leaving the restaurant. A good idea on paper (maybe) the execution of this feat is problematic. I guess Germans are more comfortable than Americans in a.) helplessly exposing their faces and hands to public urinaters, snow ball fights, etc. and b.) exposing their “rear flanks” to a restaurant full of people. Nice work Germany.
Dateline: Austin, Texas
File this one under “we didn’t think they’d actually show up”. Leaders of the Hyde Park Baptist Church announced a multidenominational Thanksgiving celebration and then abruptly cancelled it when they became aware that some Muslims might actually show up and pray. How’s that for religious tolerance? I guess by multidenominational, they meant Baptist plus a bake sale and a Jew. Nice work Austin.
According to local news and the Lake Mary Police, a man went through a Dunkin’ Donuts drive-through naked from the waist down. A story like that gets our keyboard all a-twitter for the endless possibilities for absurd commentary.
First, we’ll point out that this is yet another example of why we don’t watch the local news. Ever. Mix in a faulty weather forecast, a few murder and arson stories, and some douchebag at the sports desk and you get every local news cast in every city in this country.
Second, the quality of reporting here is fantastic- note in the beginning that the “reporter” is holding a cup of coffee while going through the drive-through, presumably to re-enact the illegal behavior. One can only hope that the re-enactment stopped with the coffee cup and that this reporter actually kept her pants on. Also note the cheapshot the reporter gets in when she states the only thing the naked guy had going for him was his red Corvette, a clear veiled slam on the perps’ genitalia. Nothing classier than a beat reporter slamming a dude’s junk on the newscast.
Thirdly, and more random, search Youtube for “Man gets coffee without pants” and the very first video that comes up is some Ron Paul video. We’re not kidding- try it if you don’t believe us. That should fuel the fire for the Ron Paulite conspiracy theorists out there.
Finally, we thought maybe it would be appropriate for Dunkin’ Donuts or another coffee chain to name a couple drinks in honor of the naked customer. We came up with a few off the top of our heads- how about a “Cockaccino”? Or maybe a “Caffe Nopants”? Or how about a “Caramel Ballsiato”? Feel free to send any suggestions you can come up with to editor@redrenee.com.
It’s been awhile since we’ve gotten some Will Ferrell up and awhile is too long. Here’s an interview with Tom Izzo put up a little while ago on Will’s website- Funny or Die. Below that is a classic and one that takes on new meaning given the current housing and economic issues.
If you missed the NBA All-Star festivities this weekend (and based on the ratings, you did miss it), here are the highlights from the dunk contest including a candle-blowout dunk. Has to be seen to be believed.
Not a fiscal blizzard, which implies a slowdown, but something that ultimately looks pretty in the moonlight. Not a fiscal twister, which wipes out a few mobile homes but not much else. No, a fiscal tsunami. Natives, tourists, and models alike.
I don’t care about what side of the aisle you sit on, that use of language should cause anyone to pause. Here’s what “tidings of joy” David Walker of the alleged bipartisan agency Government Accountability Office says are on the way:
* Absent reform, starting in 2041 social security will only have enough reserves to pay 73 cents of every dollar of promised benefits. The lesson here is start saving 27 cents per day so you’re prepared in 2041.
* Medicare is underfunded by over $32 trillion.
* Only 50% of workers in the U.S. have a private pension plan and we have the lowest savings rate of any industrialized nation.
* Without double-digit growth in GDP for decades, our economy won’t be able to simply “grow out of” these issues, absent reform.
* According to Mr. Walker, we could not renew the Bush tax cuts, eliminate all foreign aid, eliminate all earmarks, eliminate NASA, eliminate the National Endowment of the Humanities, and eliminate the entire Defense Department tomorrow and we still wouldn’t solve our current fiscal issues.
I do agree with Mr. Walker on several areas- first, we as a people are far too caught up in the here and now and don’t take enough steps to prepare for tomorrow. We’re an instant gratification society and focus most of our energy on today. Second, fiscal education in this country is worthless, or worse still, not present at all. And third, the government isn’t going to take care of you- you need to take care of yourself, starting by not counting on social security to fund your happily ever after.
Postlude: Not long after I started putting this post together, Mr. Walker announced his resignation as head of the GAO. He’s resigning to lead an independent group called Peter G. Peterson Foundation where he’ll do much of what he does now, but will be able to do so without being quite so politically correct.
First, an interesting idea for you. I remember hearing about something like this in the UK where fans bought majority interest in a football (soccer) club. Sounds like it’s about to happen so start selling all your sports memorabilia to generate capital…
Second, another unfortunate incident to give good Catholics a bad name. As reported at SportsbyBrooks.com, a catholic school in Kansas refused to use a ref for a boys basketball game because the ref is a woman. Even if it is some radical throwback offshoot, and even if parts of Kansas are still stuck in the 1950’s, this is unacceptable behavior. Certainly proof that stupid doesn’t have a religion.
Third, Mark O. is excited about baseball season and offers this classic video of a Mississippi Braves manager going all Russell Crowe on the infield.
Finally, Mark O. offers this open letter detailing why he fired his secretary; a forwarded e-mail turned blog post if you will.
Why I fired my Secretary, by Mark O.
Last week was my birthday and I didn’t feel very well waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, “Happy Birthday!”, and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone “Happy Birthday.”
I thought…well, that’s marriage for you, but the kids…they will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn’t say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, “Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!” It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o’clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.”
I said, “Thanks, Jane, that’s the greatest thing I’ve heard all day. Let’s go!”
We went to lunch. But we didn’t go where we normally would go. She chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day…we don’t need to go straight back to the office, Do We?”
I responded, “I guess not. What do you have in mind?”
She said, “Let’s drop by my apartment; it’s just around the corner.”
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, “Boss, if you don’t mind, I’m going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I’ll be right back.”
“Ok.” I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out
carrying a huge birthday cake …followed by
my wife,
my kids,
and dozens of my friends
and co-workers,
all singing “Happy Birthday”.
This is pretty cool in a demented super-mega-film-school geeky kind of way. It would be even better if they did it somewhere a little more challenging, like crossing a street in Rome or during the running of the bulls in Pamplona. Then I’d be really impressed.
We’d be remiss if we didn’t recap some of the spectacular testimony from the Roger Clemens’ Congressional hearing on Wednesday. Our comments are as follows:
1.) The whole thing is a complete waste of tax-payer money, and an angry attempt to justify the findings of the Mitchell Report. If Clemens has in fact broken a law and perjured himself, indict him and give him a fair trial where his defense counsel has a chance to research and cross-examine witnesses as the law allows. This dog and pony show is gratuitous, and again, a complete waste of tax payer money, and during an election year I might add.
2.) I’m not body language expert but Clemens sure looks guilty. The exchange about the B-12 shots is curious too- Clemens says McNamee gave him B-12 shots and McNamee says he doesn’t even know what B-12 is (which is laughable). I wonder if in Clemens mind he hasn’t rationalized HGH as “B-12 shots” and thus by admitting to the B-12 shots he feels like he’s telling the truth.
3.) There’s no way McNamee would have injected HGH into Clemens’ wife while Clemens wasn’t home and without Clemens’ knowledge. Any red-blooded American man would kick any other man’s ass for injecting HGH into his wife, with or without her permission, and certainly would never let it happen while that red-blooded American man wasn’t home, and most especially, not a hot head like Roger Clemens. Again, laughable.
Here are the highlights from ESPN which, all things aside, does make for compelling TV.
And in yet another gross waste of taxpayer money, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell met with Senator Arlen Specter about the Patriots’ spygate scandal. With boat loads of foreign and domestic issues, Senator Specter felt it necessary to spend valuable tax payer money looking into the hoodie using a video camera to tape defensive.
And for some comic relief, here’s some additional Clemens-McNamee footage:
What do you get when you take a couple of lawnmowers on Wistrol, two garbage cans, four wagon wheels and a bunch of good ol’ boys with too much time on their hands? Redneck Chariot Races!
The home stretch of the primary season is in sight so time to check on the current Presidential odds. Sadly, all of the exotic picks have fallen off the board- people like Clint Eastwood, Bill Maher, and James Carville. Instead, the field is pretty well defined, with perhaps a couple of surprises. Keep in mind these are odds to be elected President, not to win the party nomination:
Barack Obama 4-5 Hillary Clinton 3-2 John McCain 3-2 Al Gore 5-1 Michael Bloomberg 5-1 Mike Huckabee 25-1 Ron Paul 100-1 Mike Gravel 500-1
This might be the worst commercial in the history of commercials. It’s got all the telltale signs of a real piece of crap: bad use of a pop song, overacting, gross dramatization of denture cream, and misuse of senior citizens.
The poster on Youtube disabled the necessary code to put the video right here so you’ve got to click this link:
Last Thursday Congress passed a rebate plan that will send checks to Americans in late spring or early summer. The typical family of four will receive $1,800 in “rebates” as a move to either spur the economy or get people elected or both. For now, we’ll set aside the issue that the government is just giving us back what was rightfully ours in the first place. Instead, we’re focusing on four things we’d like to see Americans do with their refund checks that will provide meaningful impact to the economy:
1. Pay down your credit card debt
2. Use the rebate for closing costs to refinance your risky home mortgage
3. Pay down your home equity line which you used to finance your Brazilian cherry floors and granite countertops
4. Make a couple extra Hummer payments
And because we care about you so much, here are four things you definitely should not do with your refund check:
1. Cash the check for 1,800 singles and head to a strip club
2. Lay it all on the Jets in ‘08
3. Spinner rims on the Pinto
4. Two words: “All in”
If you’re like me, when you go shopping for lingerie for your gal this site can be a help. It’s called KnickerPicker.com and it allows you to have models try on the lingerie so you can actually see it on a woman. You can even have them turn around and come closer for a better look if need be.
For me, the hardest part (no pun intended, ok, yes it was) of buying something for Mrs. Mark O. is figuring out what the damn thing actually looks like. I mean, come on, who can tell what all those straps and lace and slivers of material actually look like on a woman? half the time I can’t figure out which is the front and which is the back. And god forbid if it falls off the hanger! If that happens I just drop it on the floor and run to another rack.
Anyhow, the models aren’t the hottest, but what do you expect from a UK online lingerie store anyhow? I’m sure these gals are about the best Brighton has to offer. At least they have decent teeth…
Not really safe for work. And a decent time waster even if you don’t need to buy anything before next Thursday.
Decaying the American Brain. That’s what we’ve posted this video under because that’s what is happening.
This video is yet another example of spoiled, entitlement-mentality Americans looking to blame someone for their bad choices in life. It’s a growing epidemic and will only get worse if parents raising kids right now choose to shelter their children from life’s lessons rather than allow them to make harmless mistakes at an early age so they can learn from them.
And can you imagine if some judge actually saw merit in this case? The precedent would bring the real estate industry to its’ knees, and the economy along with it. I’m not saying there aren’t bad realtors, because there are. There are also plenty of really, really good ones. The point is, you make your own decisions in life. Do so wisely and with your best judgment and stop looking for someone to blame America.
The real question is how did these two half-wits scrape together enough coin to buy a $1.2 million house?
The 2008 college football recruits have been signed and the speculation of who’s going where has ended. Almost. The obvious exception is all-world QB Terrelle Pryor. Here’s what Terrelle had to say on signing day:
Pryor is reportedly headed for official recruiting visits to Penn State and Oregon, of which the latter should be bad news for both Ohio State and Michigan.
The recruiting ratings are recited frequently by fans but as you can see from the table below, if there’s science to it, the scientists don’t agree.
Regardless of how accurate the rankings are, we decided to update our 2008 preview post with the final Scout.com numbers. That information is below. We’ll also put out a very early pre-season Ocho in the coming days.
1. LSU Key Senior losses RT Carnell Stewart, TE Keith Zinger, TE Mit Cole, WR Early Doucet, QB Matt Flynn, RB Jacob Hester, LT Glenn Dorsey, DE Kirston Pittman (assuming he can’t get another year of eligibility), LB Luke Sanders, LB Ali Highsmith, LB Jonathan Zenon, SS Craig Steltz, CB Chevis Jackson, P Patrick Fisher
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Ryan Perrilloux should step in nicely as the full-time starter. We think he’ll hit some speed bumps along the way, but if the SEC Championship game was any indication, the QB position is in good hands.
How does the schedule line up? Pretty favorably- no key out-of-conference matchups, Georgia and Alabama at home, road games at Florida and Auburn.
Are they a contender? Always. The holes on defense are going to be awfully hard to replace, not to mention the loss of D-Coordinator Bo Pelini. Both the Auburn and Florida games are in the first half of the season which may prove to be trouble for such a young defense. Still, the SEC West should be theirs again for the taking which could mean a potential re-match with Florida or the matchup with Tennessee that never materialized this year.
2. Georgia Key Senior losses SE Sean Bailey, C Fernando Velasco, RT Chester Adams, TB Thomas Brown, TB Kregg Lumpkin, DE Marcus Howard, SS Kelin Johnson, PK Brandon Coutu, PR Mikey Henderson, PR Thomas Flowers
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Sure do. Matthew Stafford returns for his Junior season after an improved Sophomore year.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 4
How does the schedule line up? Rough. A non-conference road game at Arizona State plus a stretch of four road games in a row to close out conference play (at LSU, at Florida, at Kentucky, at Auburn). At least the Bulldogs get Tennessee in Athens…
Are they a contender? Remains to be seen. Bulldog nation sure thinks so. Most of the key contributors return but Georgia has a brutal schedule. It also will be interesting to see if Georgia can come up with big wins when they’re “the hunted” all season long. It’s easier to play the role of the underdog as they did in 2007 in a conference as tough as the SEC. The bulls eye is going to be squarely planted on Georgia’s back as they’ll be pre-season top-5 for sure.
3. USC Key Senior losses LT Sam Baker, C Matt Spanos, RT Drew Radovich, TE Fred Davis, QB John David Booty, TB Chauncey Washington, SNP Will Collins, DE Lawrence Jackson, NT Sedrick Ellis, LB Keith Rivers, CB Terrell Thomas
Key Junior losses OG Chili Rachal
Do they have a Quarterback? Sort of. It appears that the job is mark Sanchez’ to lose. Waiting in the wings is Arkansas traitor Mitch Mustain.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 9
How does the schedule line up? Pretty tough. USC opens the season at Virginia and then will have two weeks to get ready for the OSU Buckeyes to come to town. That will be one of the biggest early season match-ups in the last five years. The conference schedule lines up nicely with the road games being at Oregon State, Washington State, UCLA, Arizona, and of course the rematch with Stanford. Oh, and Notre Dame comes to town in the second to last game of the season.
Are they a contender? Always. The Trojans don’t rebuild, and they don’t reload either. They just keep shooting- the chamber never empties. Never. They’re going to have to rebuild the offensive line and get consistency quickly at the QB position.
4. Missouri Key Senior losses WR William Franklin, LT Tyler Luellen, C Adam Spieker, TE Martin Rucker, TB Tony Temple, WR Jason Ray, NG Lorenzo Williams, CB Darnell Terrell, CB Paul Simpson
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Sure do. 4th place Heisman vote getter Chase Daniel returns to command the offense again.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 31
How does the schedule line up? Nicely. The non-conference opener against Illinois will be a huge challenge, but the rest of the slate is a walk in the park. The Big XII North is theirs for the taking if they can beat Kansas again at the end of the season. The only other challenge is the matchup at Texas on October 18th, and of course the Big XII Championship game.
Are they a contender? Doubtful. Assuming they can get past Illinois and Texas, they’ll likely have Oklahoma again in the Big XII Championship and that’ll be a tall order. It’s probably too much to expect a one-loss and a two-loss team to end up in the BCS Championship game again next year.
5. Ohio State Key Senior losses RT Kirk Barton, FB Dionte Johnson, LB Larry Grant
Key Junior losses DE Vernon Gholston
Do they have a Quarterback? Sort of. Starter Todd Boeckman returns for his Senior season after mixed results in 2007. He finished the season with only two touchdowns against six interceptions and has to be better next year to be successful. Waiting in the wings is Antonio Henton, provided he stays out of trouble. Tressel is loyal almost to a fault so he’ll give the sixth-year Senior Boeckman loads of latitude to keep the starting job, but if he has a real meltdown early on, expect to see Henton.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 7
How does the schedule line up? Mixed bag. The third game of the season is in LA against USC which will be a titanic matchup. They’ve also got to go on the road against Wisconsin, Michigan State, and Illinois. Michigan has to come to Columbus.
Are they a contender? Following the blowout loss to Florida in the championship game two years ago, most people would have assessed 2008 as the possible repeat trip, not 2007. Nearly everyone is back for the Buckeyes including five of the six Juniors that would have been drafted into the NFL had they declared early. The loss of Vernon Gholston at end will create a big void but Lawrence Wilson coming back from injury should handle the assignment as well or better. As the 2007 season hinged, 2008 will depend upon Quarterback play: solid play should put them in the thick of it when Michigan comes to town in November.
6. West Virginia Key Senior losses DL Keilen Dykes, LB Bobby Hathaway, DB Antonio Lewis, LB Marc Magro, DB Ridwan Malik, DB Ryan Mundy, RB Owen Schmitt, DB Eric Turner, DB Eric Wicks, DB Larry Williams
Key Junior losses RB Steve Slaton, WR Darius Reynaud, DE Johnny Dingle
Do they have a Quarterback? Sure do. Pat White returns to an offense that returns mostly intact, well, mostly.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 37
How does the schedule line up? Mixed bag. Auburn comes to Morgantown and an away game at Colorado highlight the non-conference. If they can split those games, that should set them up nicely for the Big East schedule which is pretty easy- Rutgers, South Florida, and Cincinnati all at home, Uconn on the road.
Are they a contender? Anything is possible in the Big East. They obviously have to replace Rich Rodriguez and the loss of Steve Slaton is key. Pat White proved down the stretch he’s neither durable enough nor reliable enough of a thrower to be the entire offense. Noel Devine will fill in nicely as Slaton’s replacement but Devine doesn’t have the size to carry the entire load, and with Owen Schmitt gone also, another running back is going to need to step up. Oh yeah, they need to rebuild a lot of the defense too.
7. Kansas Key Senior losses RT Cesar Rodriguez, TE Derek Fine, WR Marcus Henry, RB Brandon McAnderson, DT James McClinton, K Scott Webb, P Kyle Tucker,
Key Junior losses CB Aquib Talib, OT Anthony Collins
Do they have a Quarterback? Sure do. Todd Reesing returns for his Junior season after a 21-38 performance against Virginia Tech in the Orange Bowl.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 48
How does the schedule line up? A hell of a lot harder than 2007. Non-conference game at South Florida should be fun to watch. The Jayhawks get Texas and Texas Tech at home but have to travel to Oklahoma plus the season finale against Missouri, and the Big XII Championship game should they get that far.
Are they a contender? We don’t think so. Too many key losses (best DB, best RB, special teams) plus Oklahoma and Texas both back on the schedule mean the fighting Manginos will have a hard time getting to the Big XII championship game, let alone the National Championship.
8. Oklahoma Key Senior losses TE Joe Jon Finley, RB Allen Patrick, DT Steven Coleman, DE Alonzo Dotson, LB Lewis Baker, CB Marcus Walker, SS D.J. Wolfe, K Garrett Hartley,
Key Junior losses WR Malcolm Kelly, LB Curtis Lofton, DB Reggie Smith
Do they have a Quarterback? Sure do. Sam Bradford returns for his Redshirt Sophomore season after a record-breaking Freshman season.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 13
How does the schedule line up? Pretty good. The only non-conference game with a pulse is the home date with Cincinnati. The Sooners get Texas Tech and Kansas at home with no difficult road games to speak of…maybe Oklahoma State or Kansas State. Maybe.
Are they a contender? Absolutely. Bradford is losing several of his weapons but that isn’t usually an issue at Oklahoma. The secondary is going to have to have to gel quickly with Cincinnati coming in the second game and Texas showing up in game six. The Sooners should also be looking to avenge their embarrassing loss to West Virginia.
9. Virginia Tech Key Senior losses SE Josh Morgan, FL Eddie Royal, FS D.J. Parker
Key Junior losses CB Branden Flowers
Do they have a Quarterback? Uhhhh…sort of. Sean Glennon and Tyrod Taylor both proved to be servicable throughout the 2007 season. Unfortunately, both also played at times like they belong behind center at Florida State. One of them is going to have to do better than the 91.93 QB rating Glennon had in the Orange Bowl or the -2.53 rating Taylor had (I’m not making this up).
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 20
How does the schedule line up? Cake, with a side of pie. The stiffest non-conference test is at Nebraska. When you stop laughing, I’ll continue. The Hokies don’t have to play Clemson (until the ACC Championship game) and get Virginia and Maryland at home. Road games at Miami and Florida State may be mildly interesting.
Are they a contender? Without a doubt. It’s all going to revolve around what kind of QB play they can get. Most of the team is returning, including a very strong defense, and there’s little standing in their way in the ACC with Boston College rebuilding. If they can beat Clemson in the ACC Championship game, this may be the year for the Hokies to get to the NC.
10. Texas Key Senior losses LB Scott Terry, CB Brandon Foster, C Dallas Griffin, S Marcus Griffin, OT Tony Hills, S Erick Jackson, WR Nate Jones, S Drew Kelson, LB Robert Killebrew, DT Derek Lokey, DT Thomas Marshall, DT Frank Okam, WR Limas Sweed
Key Junior losses RB Jamaal Charles, TE Jermichael Finley
Do they have a Quarterback? Colt is thy name. McCoy is thy clan.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 17
How does the schedule line up? Pretty well. Arkansas comes into town for the non-conference intrigue. Home conference games include Missouri and Oklahoma State. Road games include Kansas and Texas Tech plus the neutral matchup with Oklahoma.
Are they a contender? Don’t think so. Texas has a lot of holes to fill and should be underdogs vs. both Oklahoma and Missouri. If they can find some inspiration, they might be able to win the Big XII South. Maybe.
10. (tie) Boston College Key Senior losses WR Kevin Challenger, LT Gosder Cherilus, LG Ty Hall, QB Matt Ryan, TB Andre Callender, TB L.V. Whitworth, DE Nick Larkin, FS Jamie Silva, CB Taji Morris, P Johnny Ayers
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Nope. Matt Ryan heads off to the NFL along with all of BC’s hopes and dreams. Senior-to-be Chris Crane threw exactly four passes in 2007 completing two. Sophomore-to-be Billie Flutie threw one pass.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 22
How does the schedule line up? No thanks to the BC Athletic Department, who don’t list the 2008 schedule on their website, just fine. Non-conference is laughable. Maryland, Clemson, and Virginia Tech all at home. At Florida State is the only challenging conference road game.
Are they a contender? Not at all. The defense should be good but losing Silva will hurt. The offense is going to struggle. The Eagles had no running game and loses their top two running backs. Matt Ryan was the offense in 2007 and they’re going to be searching for answers next year.
12. Tennessee Key Senior losses RT Eric Young, TE Brad Cottam, TE Chris Brown, QB Erik Ainge, DE Xavier Mitchell, DT J.T. Mapu, DE Antonio Reynolds, LB Ryan Karl, CB Antonio Gaines, FS Jonathan Hefney, SS Jarod Parrish
Key Junior losses LB Jerod Mayo,
Do they have a Quarterback? Nope. Jonathan Crompton was the backup this year throwing exactly twelve passes, completing nine of them, two of which went to the other team unfortunately.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 35
How does the schedule line up? Pretty rough. The non-conference slate includes a visit to UCLA in the second game of the season. The SEC run includes away games at Auburn, Georgia, and South Carolina. Florida comes to Knoxville, as does Alabama.
Are they a contender? Nope. No quarterback, a challenging schedule and heavy losses on the defensive side spell average to below average season for Volunteer nation. Fortunately, RB Arian Foster decided to return for his Senior season which should make breaking in a new QB a little easier. Not enough though.
13. Florida Key Senior losses WR Andre Caldwell, OT Carlton Medder, C Drew Miller, K Joey Ijjas, DT Clint McMillan, S Tony Joiner
Key Junior losses DE Derrick Harvey
Do they have a Quarterback? Lord Tebow himself
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 12
How does the schedule line up? Very nicely, thank you. Two intriguing non-conference games with both Hawaii (not the same Hawaii) and U. of Miami coming to Gainesville. The SEC slate lines up very nicely with the two biggest games at home- LSU and Georgia. Road games include at Tennessee, at Arkansas, and the finale out of conference at Florida State.
Are they a contender? Without a doubt. A very young defense returns without a star pass-rusher in Harvey but largely intact. We learned this year that no matter how good the offense is, that defense has to develop at a quicker pace, and they should. We’re picking the Gators as the early favorites in the East with a very good chance at winning the conference and advancing another SEC team into the NC.
14. BYU Key Senior losses WR Matt Allen, C Sete Aulai, RB Joe Semanoff, DE Judd Anderton, LB Bryan Kehl, LB Kelly Poppinga, LB Markell Staffieri, LB Chris Bolden, S Kayle Buchanan, S Ben Criddle, S Andrew Saulsberry, DB Korby Hodgkiss, FS Ben Criddle
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Yep. Max Hall and his 3,800 yards return for his Junior season.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 60
How does the schedule line up? Non-conference games include at home to UCLA and at Washington. The rest is the Mountain West- what else do you really want to know.
Are they a contender? No. Massive defensive losses mean maybe even another two-loss season may not be possible.
15. Auburn Key Senior losses FB Carl Stewart, QB Brandon Cox, LT King Dunlap, TE Cole Bennett, DE Quentin Groves, DT Josh Thompson, SS Eric Brock, DB Patrick Lee, DB Jonathan Wilhite
Key Junior losses DT Pat Sims
Do they have a Quarterback? Nope. Brandon Cox is out the door and either the Kodi Burns or the Blake Field eras are about to begin.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 19
How does the schedule line up? Really well. Non-conference at West Virginia in game # 2. The Tigers get LSU, Tennessee, and Georgia all at home. At Alabama in the finale is the only road challenge.
Are they a contender? Nope. Replacing a QB and multiple defensive standouts is too much to ask in the SEC.
16. Arizona State Key Senior losses LG Robert Gustavis, C Mike Pollak, RT Zach Krula, RT Julius Orieukwu, TE Brent Miller, TE Brady Conrad, WR Rudy Burgess, WR Tyrice Thompson, TB Ryan Torain, P Jonathan Johnson, DE Kellen Mills, DT Michael Marquardt, LB Robert James, CB Chris Baloney, FS Josh Barrett, CB Justin Tryon
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Definitely. Rudy Carpenter and his 145.1 passer rating is back for his Senior season.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 16
How does the schedule line up? Pretty rough. Georgia comes into town for a non-conference tilt. Conference road games include at Cal, USC, and Arizona. Oregon comes to town.
Are they a contender? No. Keegan Herring returning at RB and the aforementioned Rudy Carpenter should soften the blow of the other departures. Still, too many holes to fill with that schedule to think the Sun Devils will have any chance of sniffing the National Championship.
17. Cincinnati Key Senior losses DE Angelo Craig, DT Jon Newton, DE Anthony Hoke, LB Leo Morgan, LB Jon Carpenter, SS Haruki Nakmura, SS Evan Sparks, LT Digger Bujnoch, LG Ken Rodriguez, TE Doug Jones, TE Earnest Jackson, WR Mike Daniels, WR Antwuan Giddens, RB Butler Benton, RB Bradley Glatthaar, RB Greg Moore, QB Ben Mauk
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Sort of. 2007 starter Ben Mauk moves on and Dustin Grutza takes over what was once his. Grutza was the on-and-off starter in both 2005 and 2006 so and will be a Senior next year.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 54
How does the schedule line up? Not good for 2nd year Head Coach Brian Kelly. Non-conference road games at Oklahoma and Hawaii plus conference road games at West Virginia, Uconn, and Louisville. South Florida and Rutgers are at home.
Are they a contender? Nope.
18. Michigan Key Senior losses LT Jake Long, C Adam Kraus, RG Jeremy Ciulla, RG Alex Mitchell, QB Chad Henne, RB Mike Hart, K K.C. Lopata, K Jason Gingell, DE Tim Jamison, DT Will Johnson, LB Shawn Crable, LB Max Pollock, LB John Thompson, LB Chris Graham, CB Morgan Trent, FS Brandent Englemon, SS Jamar Adams, SS Charles Stewart, CB Doug Dutch
Key Junior losses WR Mario Manningham, WR Adrian Arrington, QB Ryan Mallett (not a Junior, transferred)
Do they have a Quarterback? Not unless Tyrelle Pryor commits. Even if Pryor does come to Ann Arbor, he better be the next coming of Vince Young if he expects to live through his Freshman year. He’ll be with a rebuilt offensive line, without his top running back and without the top two wide receivers, and the defense is going to have to be rebuilt also. What do you think TP? You sure you want to come to Michigan?
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 8
How does the schedule line up? Not too bad. Fortunately, Appalachian State is off the schedule this year. In their place is Utah in the home opener. The Wolverines have to play at Penn State and at Ohio State but get Wisconsin, Illinois, and Michigan State at home.
Are they a contender? Not even close. If Rich Rodriguez can get a top two finish in the Big Ten next year he gets my nomination for coach of the year. He’ll be installing a new offensive scheme with the cupboards pretty bare. It could be ugly at Michigan next year.
19. Hawaii Key Senior losses WR C.J. Hawthorne, RG Larry Sauafea, QB Colt Brennan, WR Jason Rivers, LG Hercules Satele, DE Amani Purcell, DT Michael Lafaele, DT Siave Seti, DE Karl Noa, DE Francis Maka, LB Micah Lau, LB Timo Paepule, LB Brad Kalilimoka, CB Myron Newberry, CB Keenan Jones, S Jacob Patek, CB Gerard Lewis,
Key Junior losses WR Ryan Grice-Mullins, WR Davonne Bess
Do they have a Quarterback? Pretty much. Colt Brennan is off to see if he’s a system QB or not in the NFL. Tyler Graunke has gotten plenty of experience so he should be able to step in admirably next year. Too bad the team he’s taking over will be heavily depleted.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 94
How does the schedule line up? Not good. Non-conference home games against Cincinnati and Washington State plus n-c road games at Florida and Oregon State. The only two WAC games that matter are both on the road- Boise State and Fresno State.
Are they a contender? Contenders to be .500 maybe. With a new coach and loads of new starters on both sides of the ball, expectations should be made very low in Hawaii for ‘08.
20. Illinois Key Senior losses LG Martin O’Donnell, RT Akim Millington, FB Russ Weil, WR Jacob Willis, DT Chris Norwell, DT Mike Ware, LB J Leman, LB Antonio Steele, LB Anthony Thornhill, FS Justin Harrison, SS Kevin Mitchell, SS Justin Sanders, K Jason Reda
Key Junior losses RB Rashard Mendenhall
Do they have a Quarterback? Yes*. *I’m still not convinced Juice Williams is the answer. He’s sporadic at best. He did have the best game of his career against Ohio State but finished the season throwing 13 touchdowns against 12 interceptions with a 57% completion percentage. I think Eddie McGee gives them the best chance to win, but who am I, Ron Zook? Either way, both QB’s will be back next year so they’re set.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 18
How does the schedule line up? Brutal. The season opener is again against Missouri. Road conference games include at Penn State, at Michigan, and at Wisconsin. They do get Indiana and Ohio State at home, but I’m guessing that’s going to be a pretty angry Ohio State team coming into Champaign. Good luck with that.
Are they a contender? No. There’s loads of young talent but the loss of Rashard Mendenhall can’t be understated. If the Illini fail to establish a running game, teams are going to squeeze the juice. The defense also loses lots of folks, none bigger than J Leman. The USC beatdown in the Rose Bowl should keep expectations modest in Champaign, which is where they should be.
21. Clemson Key Senior losses OT Barry Richardson, OG Chris McDuffie, OG Brandon Pilgrim, WR La’Donte Harris
Key Junior losses DE Phillip Merling
Do they have a Quarterback? Definitely. Cullen Harper will be returning for his Senior season after a tremendous Junior effort (27 TD’s, 6 INT’s)
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 11
How does the schedule line up? Pretty well. South Carolina is the toughest of the non-conference foes. Florida State and Virginia both on the road.
Are they a contender? They just might be. The schedule is manageable. The recent announcement that James Davis is returning for his senior season might unlock the key for Clemson to be among the elite in 2008.
22. Texas Tech Key Senior losses TE David Schaefer, WR Danny Amendola, WR Grant Walker, DE Tyler Yenzer, LB Paul Williams, LB Chad Hill, SS Joe Garcia, CB Chris Parker, K Alex Trlica
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Definitely. Graham Harrell returns for his Senior season and brings with him his 10,682 career passing yards and his 71.8% completion rate from last year.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 59
How does the schedule line up? Not too shabby. The non-conference is laughable. The conference slate splits Texas at home with Oklahoma on the road. Road games at Kansas and Kansas State will also be a challenge.
Are they a contender? Probably not. They’re going to have to get by both Texas and Oklahoma to be a contender, or beat one and then hope for some help to get into the Big XII title game. After that, who knows.
23. Oregon Key Senior losses LG Josh Tschirgi, RT Geoff Schwartz, WR Garren Strong, DE David Faaeteete, DT Jeremy Gibbs, LB A.J. Tuitele, LB Kwame Agyeman, FS Matthew Harper, WR Cameron Colvin, QB Dennis Dixon, WR Brian Paysinger
Key Junior losses RB Jonathan Stewart
Do they have a Quarterback? Nope. No Dennis Dixon = No Offense
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 24
How does the schedule line up? Rough. The non-conference is tricky with a road trip to Purdue and Boise State coming to Eugene. Conference road games include at Arizona State, at Cal, at Oregon State and at USC.
Are they a contender? Nope. Too many holes to fill and too tough of a schedule.
24. Wisconsin Key Senior losses QB Tyler Donovan, TE Andy Crooks, WR Paul Hubbard, C Marcus Coleman, C Danny Kaye, DE Kurt Ware, DT Nick Hayden, DE Brandon Kelly, CB Ben Strickland, P Ken DeBauche, P Paul Standring, K Taylor Melhaff,
Key Junior losses CB Jake Ikegwuono
Do they have a Quarterback? Nope. With the departure of Tyler Donovan, Allan Evridge appears to be the heir apparent. There are lots of QB’s on the roster but Evridge is the only one with any real experience. Still, they’re starting over at that position.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 26
How does the schedule line up? Pretty well. A road game at Fresno State is as tough as it gets in the non-conference. The Big Ten schedule starts with a road game at Michigan but otherwise is pretty manageable. Ohio State, Penn State, and Illinois all come into Madison. The only other road game of consequence is at Michigan State.
Are they a contender? Maybe. Wisconsin could be a dark horse, at least in the Big Ten. If they can get a quarterback to step in right away, and repair the depleted special teams, the schedule lays out nicely.
25. Oregon State Key Senior losses WR Brandon Powers, C Kyle Devan, OG Roy Schuening, TB Yvenson Bernard, WR Matthew Sieverson, RB Clinton Polk, FB Andy Stewart, WR Anthony Brown, DE Dorian Smith, DT Gerard Lee, DT William Vea, DT Curtis Coker, DE Jeff Van Orsow, LB Derrick Doggett, LB Alan Darlin, LB Joey LaRocque, CB Gerard Lawson, S Daniel Drayton, K Alexis Serna
Key Junior losses None
Do they have a Quarterback? Yes. Both Sean Canfield and Lyle Moevao return.
Scouts Recruiting Ranking? # 61
How does the schedule line up? So so. The non-conference includes Hawaii at home plus road trips to Penn State and Utah. The conference schedule is a little more forgiving with USC, Arizona State, Cal, and Oregon all at home
Are they a contender? Not a chance. There’s rebuilding and then there’s re-populating. The Beavers are losing their entire backfield, the greatest kicker in Oregon State history, and nearly their entire defense. Beaver fans should save the game tape from the Emerald Bowl this year because 2008 is going to be rough.
We’ve been working on an angle to wrap-up Super Tuesday and really can’t come up with one. Regardless of what side of the aisle you sit on, the political drama up to this point has been pretty compelling. Edwards and Giuliani’s departures from the race, Bill and Hillary double-teaming Barack, Obama playing the race card, Hillary playing the female card, Romney playing the Conservative card, McCain playing the flip-flopper card, Ron Paul playing the Ross Perot card, and Ted Kennedy french-kissing Obama at American University. These are just some of events that stick out in our minds.
We’re going to continue to try and keep our coverage down the middle while encouraging you to be an informed voter, rather than most of the populace who tend to vote for personality and “feelings”.
Strategically, there are two (of many) storylines to continue to watch. On the Republican side, it will be interesting to see if the party can come together amidst the various factions which are pulling it apart at the seams. On the Democratic side, the touchy-feely approach to the last Democratic debate appeared to be a good strategy for the party as a whole. A nasty side effect for the Clinton campaign was Obama being elevated to a higher level of legitimacy amidst the back-patting and cordiality. After this past Tuesday, the Clinton’s will be forced to take the gloves off once again and this time do it without being accused of being racists.
If you weren’t able to vote in your state’s primary or aren’t registered in time for an upcoming primary, we encourage you to make sure you get registered in time for the general election. In case your keeping score at home, here’s the current delegate standing courtesy of MSNBC.com:
This should settle the dispute over who made Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee. Too bad they couldn’t get Joe Scarborough in on the action but funny still. This video is SFW.
If you’re in a Super Tuesday state and are still unsure of which primary candidate you’re going to hang your chad for, here’s one more site to help you decide. We didn’t take the time to fact-check the stances listed for each candidate, but it’s on the internet so it all must be true.
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