Not that it impacts the national championship picture, but if you looked at the polls closely this week, you may have noticed an anomaly in the AP poll. USC, Georgia, and Florida all were ahead of Ohio State, all lost and remained ranked ahead of the Buckeyes despite OSU winning. That’s not the anomaly, that’s to be expected considering how Ohio State has played this year, the championship losses, the fear of the vest, etc., etc…

The anomaly is Auburn quietly moving ahead of Ohio State, going from # 15 last week to # 13 this week. You could certainly justify putting Auburn ahead of the Buckeyes last week after Auburn’s 5-point loss to LSU at home. That’s a quality loss compared to the Buckeyes’ blowout at the hands of USC. But that’s not what happened.

Instead, enough AP voters were impressed by Auburn’s dominating 2-point win over a 1-3 Tennessee Volunteer team to vote them ahead of the Buckeyes. Impressed enough in fact that Auburn went from 5 points behind the Buckeyes to 31 points ahead. Objective journalists just voting their conscience. Riiiiiiiight.

Calling a spade a spade- It’s the expected bias against Ohio State for the past two National Championship transgressions. Or more to the point- it’s the “oh shit” realization by the AP voters that teams ahead of Ohio State look once again to start dropping like flies so “we better start building in some buffer”. Again- I don’t necessarily have a problem with where the Buckeyes are in the polls, I just find it unprofessional based on the movement from last week to this week by so-called unbiased “journalists”.

No matter, the AP poll means exactly nothing in terms of the BCS, having been replaced by the Harris poll in the super computer calculations. And maybe because of that, the move looks even more desparate. Incidentally, the Harris poll debuted this week with Auburn # 13, Ohio State # 14; perhaps Ed Harris (of the Harris poll) has friends in the media?

You’re welcome.

Just when you thought it was safe to turn the TV on again. Trojans? Crash and burn. Georgia between the hedges? Trimmed. Florida at the swamp? Capsized. The Badgers at the Big House? Housed. And oh yeah, Clemson lost again.

The first question I asked was “Is Alabama for real?” I’m not convinced they’re a National Championship contender just yet, but they’re awfully close. ‘Bama played a near flawless 1st half against Georgia rolling up a 31-0 halftime lead. Georgia looked helpless, both on offense and defense. Georgia made it look respectable in the second half but to get rolled like that at home poses as many questions for Georgia as it provides answers for the Crimson Tide.

Georgia was able to limit Alabama to 2.9 yards per carry rushing, but the fact that Alabama had 45 rushing attempts indicates the lop-sided nature of the affair. John Parker Wilson converted when necessary to keep drives alive. Wilson did what he needed to, going 13 of 16 for 205 yards, and most importantly no interceptions.

Highlights: (8) Alabama - (3) Georgia

Georgia gets a week off to lick their wounds and then has Tennessee, Vanderbilt (1st place SEC East), @ LSU, and Florida. Unfortunately, Knowshon Moreno might be out for a little bit. Good luck Bulldog fans.

Alabama has a much easier path in the near term with Kentucky, Ole Miss, @ Tennessee, and Arkansas State, before a road game at LSU. Each of those games leading up to LSU should be resounding wins, but will be a good test of the maturity of this Alabama team to see how they can deal with the bulls eye on their back.

The second question I posed was “Is Penn State for real?” Looks like it. They passed the first test by beating a quality opponent at home. Next up is to see if they can do the same on the road. They’re at Purdue and Wisconsin in consecutive weeks so we’ll see how they respond to that.

I also still have questions about their ability to run the ball against a good defense. Consider that of the I-A opponents they’ve played, the average ranking on rush D of those 4 is 92nd in the country (Oregon State- 72, Syracuse- 105, Temple- 97, Illinois- 94). The Defense is outstanding and as long as Daryll Clark continues to limit mistakes (only one interception), this team is headed for the Rose Bowl at a minimum.

Highlights: (22) Illinois - (12) PSU

In order for TCU to slow down Oklahoma I wrote that they needed to continue dominating the turnover margin and have success through the air. TCU went -4 on turnovers and had a 39% completion percentage through the air. Oklahoma 35 - TCU 10.

Highlights: (24) TCU - (2) Oklahoma

I questioned Michigan’s manhood. Specifically, I wrote:

Michigan stands at 1-2 with Wisconsin, Illinois, and Penn State in three of their next four games. A bad stretch and the Wolverines could be staring at a 2-5 record plus the likelihood of not going to a bowl game. Sitting home for the holidays would break a streak of 12 consecutive bowl games dating back to Lloyd Carr’s second year as head coach. It’s gut check time for Rich Rod and the Wolverines. They’ve got the defense to slow down Wisconsin, the question is can they avoid the turnovers that cost them the game against Notre Dame last week?

If you watched the game like I did you saw Michigan play perhaps the worst half of football in the long history of the winged helmet. In addition to falling into a 19-0 hole, the Wolverine offense turned the ball over 5 times and had a total of 21 yards of offense. The Wolverine D nutted up in the second half (and Wisconsin imploded) and the offense finally showed glimpses of what Rich Rod is coaching toward. Michigan still has enormous issues on offense, primarily a gaping void at quarterback (Threet is the best of the worst), but I believe halftime was their bottom and the rest of the season should so slight improvement.

Highlights: (9) Wisconsin - Michigan

Don’t look now but Tennessee is 1-3 following their 14-12 loss at Auburn. The offensive numbers for Tennessee are …..drum roll……offensive- 8 of 24 passing for 67 yards, 33 rushes for 124 yards. Credit a tough Auburn D for part of that, the rest goes to a Volunteer offense looking for people to volunteer as playmakers. Here’s a rational breakdown of the season to date numbers, but be forewarned- shield your children’s eyes.

I asked if Butch Davis and North Carolina would be successful in their return to Butch’s former employer, the U. They were not losing 28-24. The # 7 hurricane rush D limited North Carolina to 35 rushing yards on 33 attempts. You don’t need a calculator to figure out that’s about 1 yard per carry which won’t get it done against anyone, not even a bad but improving Hurricane squad.

I asked which UCLA team would show up at home against Fresno State- the one that beat Tennessee in week one, or the one that got blown out by BYU and Arizona. Neither showed up- but it’s clear that the Tennessee win means nothing and this Bruin team has a long way to go to end the LA football dynasty over there.

Finally I poked a little fun at LSU and Florida:

Which team will be more awesome in their beating of a team from Mississippi- Florida when they beat down ‘Ole Miss or LSU when they steal Mississippi State’s lunch money? It’s a trick question. By default, since both teams are in the SEC, and per NCAA regulation 2006.115A, the sum of its’ parts is greater than the whole, ergo ipso facto the awesomeness of the conference as a whole makes it very difficult to solve for the awesomeness of any one particular team. (check my math though)

Funny enough, Florida lost by 1 and LSU scraped by with a ten point win at home. SEC hacks will quickly point to the toughness of the conference as to the reason for both outcomes. All is not lost for Florida- it’s early enough that they can recover, but the problems in the secondary continue to rear their ugly head, and a blocked P.A.T. at home is inexcusable.

Looking at LSU though, are they really the 2nd best team in the country (as they are in the Harris and USA today polls)? A 5-point win over Auburn and a 10-point win over Mississippi State? Seriously? In a delightful bit of timing, LSU has a week off and then plays at Florida. Expect Florida to win that one and throw the polls into turmoil again.

College Football Tour Guy, episode 4. Dateline: Knoxville, TN.

Enjoy!

Tennessee from Dan Rubenstein on Vimeo.

Conference play is in full swing this week so plenty to talk about.

1.) Is Alabama for real? We’re gonna find out. The gameplan for Georgia on defense is to load the box and force Alabama Senior QB John Parker Wilson to win the game through the air. Alabama has the 14th best rushing offense vs. the 3rd best rushing defense in Georgia so at least on paper, it looks like a compelling match up. Vegas likes Georgia by 6.5- I sure hope it’s that good.

2.) Is Penn State for real? An inconsistent Illinois team should provide a reasonable barometer. Illinois is coming off a bye-week and risks being 2-2 should they lose to Penn State. Unfortunately for Illinois, to be successful they’ll need to establish the run game which I don’t think they’ll be able to do.

3.) Can TCU slow down Oklahoma? TCU has the #1 ranked defense but hasn’t faced an offense even on the same planet as OU. On offense, TCU has gotten it done on the ground and via turnovers (+12 turnover margin). The Horned Frogs will need some productivity through the air (0 touchdowns this season) and some timely turnovers to keep Oklahoma from rolling.

4.) What are the Michigan Wolverines made of? We’re gonna find out. Michigan stands at 1-2 with Wisconsin, Illinois, and Penn State in three of their next four games. A bad stretch and the Wolverines could be staring at a 2-5 record plus the likelihood of not going to a bowl game. Sitting home for the holidays would break a streak of 12 consecutive bowl games dating back to Lloyd Carr’s second year as head coach. It’s gut check time for Rich Rod and the Wolverines. They’ve got the defense to slow down Wisconsin, the question is can they avoid the turnovers that cost them the game against Notre Dame last week?

5.) Tennessee fun fact: each of the past three years following the Volunteers loss to Florida, they’ve won the next game, including a 30-27 upset win at # 3 LSU in 2005.

6.) Auburn fun fact: two out of the last three years following their loss to LSU, the Tigers have won their next game, both of those wins coming at the hands of Mississippi.

7.) Will Tar Heels’ Head Coach Butch Davis be successful in his return to the Orange Bowl (Dolphin Stadium) against his former team Miami? Davis has been successful so far in his plan to raise North Carolina to mediocrity and borderline national awareness. Unfortunately, he just lost his QB for six weeks to an injury, on an offense that wasn’t very good to start with. Miami continues to either not recruit for or not care about offense (94th in total offense) but they do have a decent defense. Take the Canes in this one.

8.) Which UCLA team is going to show up against # 25 Fresno State today? The one that beat Tennessee in week one or the one that got blown out by BYU and Arizona?

9.) Which team will be more awesome in their beating of a team from Mississippi- Florida when they beat down ‘Ole Miss or LSU when they steal Mississippi State’s lunch money? It’s a trick question. By default, since both teams are in the SEC, and per NCAA regulation 2006.115A, the sum of its’ parts is greater than the whole, ergo ipso facto the awesomeness of the conference as a whole makes it very difficult to solve for the awesomeness of any one particular team. (check my math though)

You’re welcome.

Leave it to the Beavers. The scene in Corvallis, Oregon last night was simply stunning. Breathtakingly, eye-openingly, stunning.

In yet another example that college football can just as easily be affected by emotion as it can by talent or coaching, Oregon State thoroughly dominated the near-unanimous # 1 Trojans. It wasn’t a fluke or an accident, it was pure and simple an ass-kicking.

After two blowout wins for USC, the Pac-10 schedule was expected to be a march toward coronation. Next stop, National Championship. Maualuga, here’s the Butkus. Jeff Byers, here’s your Rimington. Sanchez, the Heisman’s yours next year, this year if you really, really want it.

Oregon State had been at best inconsistent; at worst hapless, up until last night. An opening season loss at Stanford by 8. A game two blowout at Penn State 45-14. A game three win over a weaponless Hawaii.

USC was favored by 25 points and expected to roll against an unranked, inferior team. Not so much.

The best headline I’ve seen this morning is from Trojanwire.com. The headline simply reads: “Jacquizzed”.

Jacquizzed indeed. The Trojans have five-star recruits washing towels back at their training facility. Oregon State had the 52nd ranked recruiting class in the country last year according to Rivals.com, sandwiched just between Baylor and Iowa. OSU had one 5-star recruit, and the undoing for the Trojans was a 3-star, five and half foot (barely) true Freshman Jacquizz Rodgers. Rodgers gashed USC for 186 yards on 37 carries.

You just got Jacquizzed bitches

Rodgers made use of his fleet feet by constantly cutting back against the speed, and dare I say overpursuit of the USC defense. Both lines were dominated by OSU and the Beavers were able to convert several key 3rd downs through the air when they needed to, despite the erratic throwing of Junior QB Lyle Moevao. Moevao’s passes were so erratic that there could have easily been 4 or 5 interceptions, including a tipped pass at the end zone at the end of the 1st half. That pass instead landed in the hands of James Rodgers (Jacquizz’ older brother) for a touchdown. Sometimes that’s how the ball bounces.

A side bar to the Rodgers family: what was the thought process between naming one son “James” and the other “Jacquizz”? Just curious. No matter, it’s my new favorite adverb.

And getting back to emotion, perhaps no other team in America is as emotional as USC. And last night they were emotionless. They looked like they were in a fog- questioning who was slapping them in the face, wondering why receivers were dropping passes, and trying to figure out how the hell to tackle the diminutive and elusive Jacquizz.

USC consistently relies on loose, fun practices and the ability to “turn it on” between the lines. The trouble is that great teams, even the best teams have trouble consistently “turning it on”. And USC has certainly proven that with last night’s loss, last year’s shocker to Stanford, and the loss the year before to the same Oregon State team.

It’s one of those take the good with the bad things. The good is very good; most teams would make multiple deals with the devil (and do) to get a piece of it. But the bad is staggering. And yet, of all the USC fans I met out in L.A. two weeks ago, only two seem to be tinted with any dose of humility after such events.

Where to go next is the question for the Trojans. Sanchez made mistakes you would expect a first-year starter to make last night, but clearly was favoring his injured knee so there could be trouble there. Linebacker Rey Maualuga left the game with a sprained knee. Safety Taylor Mays left the game with an undisclosed chest injury after coughing up blood. Linebacker Brian Cushing broke a bone in his hand. And damaged worst of all was the Trojan Machismo- getting bitchslapped by your younger, much uglier cousin on national TV.

Taking a step back and looking at the Pac-10 landscape, consider that not a single team in the league stands undefeated a mere four weeks into the season. Arizona and Oregon stand at the top of the conference at 3-1. For USC, they’ve got consecutive home games with Oregon and Arizona State coming up and who knows where their heads will be. Assuming Carroll circles the wagons and Maualuga puts the pink thong back on, USC will no doubt roll through the rest of their schedule, and be at the center of the “playing the best football” argument at the end of the season as Matt Hinton so deftly pointed out over at Dr. Saturday.

The effects on the national landscape are profound, just like it was last year. I think it’s a lock now that we’ll have another one-loss team in the national championship. I’ve stated either Oklahoma or Missouri should come through the Big XII untouched but after that, it’s unlikely anyone else will. Either because of the quality of opponents or the mediocrity of offenses (you decide) in the SEC, it’s highly unlikely an undefeated team will come from there. It certainly is possible that a team like Penn State could run the table in the Big Ten but would you bet any material sums of money on that? I sure wouldn’t.

After that, who are we looking at? Wake Forest? South Florida again? Utah/BYU/TCU? We’re headed for more BCS trouble, that’s where we’re headed.

You’re welcome.

We’re looking out for your health today (don’t expect it to continue) with some excerpts from MSN.com and Men’s Health.

They’ve put together several articles about things you shouldn’t eat, and for somebody like me who travels often, it’s helpful. Most of this is pretty obvious stuff but let’s be honest, it doesn’t hurt to state the obvious, especially for men.

First up is a breakfast choice should you find yourself at Hardee’s (east coast equivalent of Carl’s Jr. for all you west coast gang-bangers). If you’re at Hardee’s in the a.m., don’t go for the “Monster Biscuit”.

The Monster Biscuit has 710 calories, 51 grams of fat, and is the sodium equivalent of six orders of large french fries (according to the website).

If you’re at Denny’s with your kids, don’t let them order the “Big Dipper French Toastix (with margarine and syrup)”. This bad boy has 770 calories and the fat equivalent of 23 chicken McNuggets. Damn.

In probably the most obvious of any of these, the Cinnabon Classic Cinnamon Roll isn’t good for you.

I admit, I’ve tried to rationalize getting the Cinnabon “mini’s” either in the mall or the airport, but whoah nelly these are hefty. 813 calories, 32 grams of fat, and a fun fact for sure- the caloric equivalent of 7 bowls of Froot Loops.

The article cites the worst breakfast in America as the Bob Evans Stacked and Stuffed Caramel Banana Pecan Hotcakes. This bad boy rings in at 1,543 calories, 77 grams of fat, the saturated fat equivalent of 26 strips of bacon and the sugar equivalent of 12 chocolate chip cookies. You might as well curl up in the fetal position right there in the Bob Evans booth and sleep the rest of the day off.

Several other items of note from some of their related articles. First, and this is for my sister-in-law, the worst “healthy” drink goes to Glaceau VitaminWater. This beauty has almost as many calories and grams of sugar as a can of Coke.

Pumpkin = good. Muffins = gooooooood. Panera’s Pumpkin Muffin = Not so good. This delightful treat has 530 calories and a whopping 47 grams of sugar. I’m going to go out on a limb and say the Cinnamon Crunch bagels probably aren’t that good for you either (damn you cinnamon crunch bagel!).

Staying with Panera, the award for “The Most Sugar-Packed Breakfast Pastry” goes to Panera’s Cobblestone Sweet Roll. Tipping the scales at 590 calories and 61 grams of sugar, you might want to skip the frozen coffee on the side.

Speaking of frozen coffee drinks- Cosi’s 24 ounce Gigante Double Oh! Artic has 1,033 calories and 35 grams of fat. Fortunately my beloved IC Mocha at Panera “only” has 670 calories and 28 grams of fat.

For appetizers at Chili’s, skip the “Awesome Blossom”. Even if you share this with others, its’ got 2,710 calories and the fat equivalent of 67 slices of bacon!!

Finally, and saving the best/worst for last, should you find yourself at Uno Chicago Grill do not order the Mega-Sized Deep Dish Sundae.

This dessert (all four servings of it) includes a staggering 2,800 calories and 272 grams of sugar.

If you’re looking for good things to eat, head to this article for the 125 healthiest supermarket foods in America.

You’re welcome.

Updating this week’s ten worst in college football.

Florida International continues to hold down the worst spot offensively averaging a measly 179 yards per game (that’s about 45 yards per quarter). Virginia remains in second worst.

On the defensive side there’s a new worst in town- the SMU Mustangs. SMU is giving up an average of 531 yards per game through 4 games. There’s also a new # 2 here in the Washington Huskies. UW moved down from 4th last week.

A few of the effects are not 100% but overall this is pretty well done.

Without further ado, we present to you the first installment of the 2008 Ocho. We wanted to wait a few weeks so that there were actually some games played before we formed opinions on teams, and we have no problem moving teams drastically up or down based on the strength of wins, not just on losses.

We differ from the AP and Coaches in several places. No argument from us on USC being # 1. Even with only two games played for them, they’ve got the best resume and a scary collection of talent. We like Oklahoma at # 2 also. That’s where the similarities end.

We think Georgia is still getting too much credit from the national media and Missouri is getting short-changed, based on results on the field. We like Florida better than Georgia, again based on the body of work, though both teams have visible weaknesses.

Alabama is a little low in our opinion, but certainly will have a short stay in the Ocho if they lose to Georgia this week.

Penn State is probably suffering at the hands of the Big Ten bias, but if you look at how they’ve played and the statistics, they’re definitely getting shortchanged in both the AP and Coaches’. If Penn State beats Illinois decisively this weekend, we’re moving them into the top 5.

You’re welcome.

We’re certainly not in support of hurricanes, the Red Renee world headquarters was without power for two days after Ike, and Galveston is pretty well destroyed (real sensitive to list Galveston second, I know). However, should there be a few more peaceful, harmless hurricanes in the Atlantic, we’ll see a Hurricane Rene. They’ve left off an “e” but we’d be honored to have a hurricane named after us, but only if it plays nice.

Episode Three, Dateline: Iowa City, Iowa. A disappointing effort which we’ll blame squarely on Iowa Hawkeye fans.

Iowa from Dan Rubenstein on Vimeo.

You’re welcome.

In the midst of the Senate hearing on the proposed economic bailout today, we encourage you to research the issues and understand fully what is being proposed and how it may effect our economy. We also encourage you to have some fun by playing the blame game. Head over to www.portfolio.com to play the “Who killed the economy” game. It’s a 16-seed march madness format to determine who the ultimate culprit is. Funny that the Democrat-majority Congress isn’t in the field. Hmmmm…

Protectionism is one of the scariest “ism’s” of all the “ism’s”. Fortunately the good folks at Onion.com have taken it upon themselves to skillfully weave protectionism with election coverage. Probably NSFW. Enjoy!

Obama Promises To Stop America’s Shitty Jobs From Going Overseas

Subtitled: Southern Exposure

The SEC took center stage in week 4 and while there weren’t really any big surprises, there was plenty of good football to watch. And in case you didn’t see it, Tennessee is still Florida’s bitch.

The first question I posed was whether or not the LSU-Auburn game could live up to its’ prime-time billing. It certainly did. Both defenses controlled the tempo of the game and seven total turnovers swung momentum back and forth like a pendulum. LSU made more plays including rolling the dice on a half-back pass (which went for a touchdown) and an onside kick in the 3rd quarter (which they successfully recovered).

Even with all that, LSU still had to come up with a touchdown in the last two minutes to pull ahead and win. LSU still has quarterback questions and Auburn continues to have consistency issues on offense, but both teams proved to have very solid defenses. Incidentally I wrote that Auburn would cover the 2 1/2 point spread, which in retrospect was an awfully stupid prediction. They didn’t cover, losing by 6.

I questioned whether Tennessee had any heart left.

Tennessee actually played Florida tight statistically speaking outgaining them in total yards, but crucial errors and questionable coaching decisions put the margin of victory into “whoopin’ ” territory. Two of UT’s three turnovers came at the end of promising drives inside the Florida 5 yard line. Throw in the fact that the Vols insisted on kicking to Brandon James (130 return yards, punt return for a touchdown) instead of just kicking the ball out of bounds/squibbing or falling to the ground in the fetal position.

Then there’s Phil Fulmer’s typical sprinkle of magic- going for two in the 4th quarter when the score reads 27-6. I’m sure Fulmer was just trying to spark some momentum for a downward-spiraling team, but in typical Tennessee fashion, that plan backfired. According to this chart, technically Fulmer might have been right. Still, Tennessee starts the year 1-2 again and this time, I don’t think Fulmer will be able to bring them back.

I picked Tennessee to cover the 7 1/2 point spread here and of course they didn’t. In fact, Florida more than tripled the spread.

Georgia beat Arizona State 27-10 in what turned out to be a letdown (for viewers). The luster was taken off the game a week prior when ASU lost to UNLV, and Arizona State was never really in contention. Matthew Stafford proved to the better quarterback and Georgia Running Back Knowshon Moreno added more yards and highlights to his Heisman film reel.

Ohio State rebounded after USC but didn’t cover the 20 1/2 point spread against Troy, winning by a tally of 28-10 (predicted that one right). The quarterback battle never emerged as Terrelle Pryor played nearly the entire game, and former starter Todd Boeckman was limited to only two snaps.

As I highlighted on Friday, Texas once again whipped Rice, 52-10. We get it Texas- you can beat Rice. Well done, we’re all verrry impressed. Now get them off your freaking schedule.

Finally, I picked Michigan State to beat Notre Dame. That pick was like taking candy from a baby- final score MSU 23 - ND 7. It turns out Michigan State only needed Javon Ringer to beat the golden domers. Ringer rushed for 201 yards and had two touchdowns vs. the one touchdown and 258 total yards of offense for Notre Dame. If they game weren’t in East Lansing, MSU could have just put Ringer on a scooter and had him drive himself over to South Bend.

You’re welcome.

1.) Can LSU-Auburn live up to the “best game of the weekend” billing? Probably not. Auburn is coming off its’ 3-2 soccer win over Mississippi State and LSU is on the road after delivering kind beatings to a I-AA and a Sun Belt opponent. Both teams have plenty to prove and with top ten rankings for each, one of them is going to take a tumble. Vegas likes LSU by 2 1/2, I like Auburn to cover at home in a very low-scoring game.

2.) Do Fulmer’s UT Vols have any heart left? Tennessee recovered last week after their heartbreaking week one loss to UCLA. The vols endured a hearty helping of Gator trash talk this week and are looking to avenge Florida blowing them out last year. Florida is favored by 7 1/2 and I’d love to pick Tennessee outright but I do like them to cover the spread.

3.) Can Arizona State upset # 3 Georgia? Not bloody likely. It’s hard to tell where ASU’s head will be at after their overtime loss to a crappy UNLV team last week. Georgia will look to establish the run early to control the clock and bring heavy pressure on ASU QB Rudy Carpenter to keep him from getting on track. Georgia will also be looking to improve on their lackluster 14-7 win over South Carolina last week. I expect another disappointing loss for the Pac-10, and more chest-beating from the SEC.

4.) Will anyone nationally either in print or on TV point out that #11 Texas Tech is playing their second I-AA opponent this season? Anyone?! Of course not. Instead, it will be another installment of the Graham Harrell/Michael Crabtree lovefest.

5.) Can Ohio State rebound after getting the scarlet and the grey kicked out of them last week? Two-time defending Sun Belt champ Troy comes into Columbus ranking 11th in total offense and 5th in total defense. That isn’t exactly the kind of rebound opponent a scattered Buckeye team was looking for. Ohio State is favored by 20 1/2 and I don’t think there’s any way they’re going to cover that, and they’ve got a pretty fair shot at losing depending on how much emotion they play with. The sub plot will be to watch the emerging quarterback battle between Freshman Terrelle Pryor and Senior Todd Boeckman.

6.) It’s funny to me that Texas gets a pass each year when Rice comes into town to take their Longhorn beating. Most other top ten teams get blasphemed whenever they schedule/obliterate in-state opponents. Yet very little is mentioned regarding Rice-Texas despite the fact that Rice has only come within four touchdowns of Texas once in the last five consecutive meetings. (I’m aware none of this is a question).

7.) After dispatching one of the worst Michigan teams in the last 25 years, can Notre Dame get the two-fer with a win over Michigan State? Don’t count on it. Notre Dame is still a mess and Michigan State needs a win to be 3-1 heading into conference play. I like Sparty in this one.

You’re welcome.

Tina Fey’s Sarah Palin impression is right on the money. And finally some honest talk from Hillary Clinton.

And on the Sarah Palin subject, here’s another egotistical Hollywood-type running their mouth about things they have no business talking about. Add Matt Damon to the list of actors whose movies I won’t be watching.

Updating you on the ten worst offenses and defenses in America, at least statistically speaking. As an added bonus, I’ve also got the ten worst on 3rd down conversions and turnovers for your reading and referencing enjoyment.

Some movement in the ten worst offenses, most notably is Michigan moving out and Syracuse moving in. Syracuse has the dubious distinction of placing in the ten worst on both offense and defense- nice! Also honorable mention to the PAC-10 who place three teams in the bottom ten.

The bottom ten on defense has a new # 114 in UAB, taking the place of former # 114 Louisiana Lafayette.

The bottom ten on 3rd down conversions has several BCS-conference members plus former offensive juggernaut Hawaii at the very bottom. On 33 3rd down attempts, Hawaii has converted 5 for a 15.2% conversion rate. Maybe former QB Colt Brennan was a better quarterback than he got credit for.

Finally, the ten worst on turnover margin. Hawaii holds down worst on this list also with a -9 turnover margin through three games. A couple other medium-profile programs here including UCLA and South Carolina.

You’re welcome.

The Jort Report and the Tim Tebow love-fest. Enjoy!

Florida from Dan Rubenstein on Vimeo.

Subtitled: Post-Mortem on the “Horror in the Hood”

Post-titled: “Busted Nut”

Week 3 of the college football season delivered loads of drama and devastation, leaving me to believe that 2008 might just be a continuation of 2007. I was on hand to witness first-person USC’s beatdown of the Buckeyes. Unfortunately, that left me watching snippets of most other games while tailgating, but I’m not complaining. If I had the means and the time, that’s how I’d spend every Saturday (minus the butt-kicking).

Unfortunately for Buckeye nation, much of my words of caution leading up to USC-OSU materialized. On Thursday I wrote about how the Buckeyes had managed only 6 touchdowns against 8 field goal attempts through the first two games. Ohio State would have been happy with that ratio on Saturday night. Unfortunately for them they managed 0 touchdowns vs. 2 field goal attempts (only one made).

In order for Ohio State to have won on Saturday evening, I said two things must happen: first they needed to disrupt Mark Sanchez. Second, they needed to use creative play-calling in passing situations to protect the offensive line (and QB Todd Boeckman). On Friday I further stated “The pocket will not hold up against the USC pass rush for more than a second or two. Quick hits will be a necessity or the USC defense will dominate the Buckeyes.” The Buckeyes did neither Saturday night. Sanchez for the most part was able to do whatever he wanted to and OSU’s offensive line, particularly in the second half, was dreadful. I give credit to Tressel and the rest of the staff for using Terrelle Pryor early and often and greatly varying a typically vanilla offense, especially in the absence of Beanie Wells.

The Buckeyes played well in the first half yet trailed 21-3. OSU actually had a yardage lead through two quarters but key mistakes and penalties (3 turnovers, 11 penalties) kept them from staying in the game. By the time a couple minutes had elapsed in the third quarter, the drama was over and the collective will of the Buckeye players had been sufficiently beaten down. And Trojan fan was gleefully rubbing it in the face of any Buckeye fan within shouting distance.

Incidentally, I also said the team that got to 300 yards of offense would win. USC finished the game with 348 yards to Ohio State’s 207.

A disturbing trend is developing for the Buckeyes that could be the central conflict for the remainder of the season. The trend is Todd Boeckman struggling in big games, and there’s enough data to support the yelps of many Buckeye fans I heard in the Coliseum Saturday to “get Boeckman out of the ****ing game”. Consider if you will:

Saturday vs. the Trojans- 14/21 passing for 84 yards, no touchdowns, 2 interceptions, 34.7 passer rating

National Championship game vs. LSU- 15/26 passing for 208 yards, 2 touchdowns, 2 interceptions, 77.1 passer rating

Michigan game 11/17/07- 7/13 passing for 50 yards, no touchdowns, 1 interception (sloppy weather game), 30.9 passer rating

Illinois game 11/10/07- 13/23 for 156 yards, no touchdowns, 3 interceptions, 37.9 passer rating

In the four most important games Ohio State has played in the last two seasons, Boeckman’s average passer rating is 40.15.

The void left by Troy Smith is gaping wide. Smith will forever be a legend in Buckeye lore for putting the team on his back and leading them to victory in game after game, the lone exception being the National Championship loss to Florida. Boeckman on the other hand has yet to prove he can perform such heroics, or even that he’s capable of “managing the game” when the stakes are the highest. You can certainly argue that when it matters the most, Boeckman struggles.

Boeckman doesn’t deserve all the blame. There is a serious sub-trend in the inability of the OSU offensive line to handle fast athletic defensive lines. Again reference Florida, Illinois, Michigan, and the mauling Saturday night at USC. At some point (that time is now) the coaching has to be called into question. Ohio State recruits players that everybody else wants. They landed three of the most highly recruited offensive lineman in this year’s recruiting class. And yet, the O-line looked helpless against the Trojan d-line and the wizardry of Pete Carroll. So either the players are being asked to “think too much” or they’re simply not getting the instruction that they need.

When the clock ran down and as the USC fans were throwing out their final obscenities, the Buckeyes had added about ten more feet of depth to their “public perception” hole, and further damaged the near-basement reputation nationally of the Big Ten. Though I’ve spent a lot of time and effort refuting the characterization of Ohio State as the tallest midget, I can no longer do so in good conscience, despite most writers and talk show hosts nationally still using reckless commentary.

Before I move on to other games around the country, just a couple notes on the atmosphere and my first time in the Coliseum. The stadium itself is rich with history but is desperate need of some upgrades. The electronics are embarrassing- two mini-trons and two tiny time clocks that look like they’ve been there since the early 80’s. There’s no other information anywhere in the stadium- no screens showing yardage or scores from other games. Nothing.

The USC band is amplified which probably doesn’t matter to most fans, but as a former musician, this is unforgivable, and very, very weak. The performance of the band was horrible too- I’ve seen better middle school bands, and this is surprising considering USC has a very good music program.

The stadium does get a thumbs up for having mostly seat-back seats and not benches that leave you numb by the third quarter. The lighting of the Olympic torch in the 4th quarter is also a really cool touch. Variety of food was strong as well- the usual stadium fare plus several other options including kettle corn, pulled pork, and espresso. The concessions areas surrounding the stadium very much had a county fair feel to it (and I mean that in a good sense and not in a “wow look at all these mullets” sense).

The tailgate scene was fun with lots of light-hearted banter between RV’s. Once the game started, there was a pretty even split between drunk assholes and knowledgeable football fans (on both sides) but I do think there’s a palpable degree of arrogance to the USC fan base. Not sure if it’s personal insecurity or over-confidence, but it was pretty distasteful Saturday night. I could tell you stories about “bad fans” like the dude that yelled “F*** Ohio State” as I walked by or the dudes that taunted women and children (not making that up) as they got up to get food, but that happens at most stadiums unfortunately, and particularly for night games. College football would be a much better place if the idiots stayed home to watch the game with their parole officer.

One more note on the horror in the hood- memo to Pete Carroll: going for it on 4th down in the 4th quarter after the Buckeyes had already been spayed and neutered (some of the players are chicks) is Busch-league and very unclassy. Sidebar- also evidence of how bad a place Ohio State is in that they should have gotten mercy-ruled if Carroll had stayed classy (stay classy Pete!)

On to the rest of the college football world…

I questioned whether South Carolina could beat Georgia for a second year in a row and I state that anything less than a ten-point win for Georgia should drop them in the polls. Georgia won by 7 and the Bulldogs lost 1st place votes in both polls (also due to how well USC played). Georgia continues to look underwhelming as the # 2 team and don’t give me any of the “SEC’s the toughest….garbage.” Georgia Southern isn’t in the SEC.

I completely whiffed on my Michigan-Notre Dame prediction. I predicted Michigan would win on the performance of their defense. Unfortunately for the Michigan D, the inept Michigan offense is now losing games for them with their six turnover performance. I don’t know when rock bottom is going to happen for Michigan this season but I’m pretty sure I don’t want to see it. And Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis further demonstrated how far out of touch with reality his by this quote “We definitely showed up against a good opponent and it’s sweet.” I’m not sure what tape Weis is watching but for the 2008 Wolverines, the adjective “good” does not apply. “Average” is a stretch. If Weis had said “We definitely showed up against a below average opponent that’s rebuilding like New Orleans after Katrina”, than yes, I’m on board.

On Friday I questioned if this was the game that would get Greg Robinson fired at Syracuse. I have checked the Syracuse papers yet but a 55-13 steamroll at the hands of Penn State is sure to get an “emergency board of trustees meeting” on the calendar. And a memo to the Big Ten- forget about Wisconsin or Michigan State or Illinois, Penn State is the team to look out for in the Big Ten this year. The old coot’s finally done it. Almost.

I questioned whether Rick Neuheisel and the UCLA Bruins could keep the magic going after their win over Tennessee. Nope. The Bruins got Rickrolled to the tune of 59-0 at the hands of BYU. I guess the football dynasty is officially over there…in Provo, Utah.

I questioned whether this would be the game to get Washington Head Coach Ty Willingham fired? Haven’t checked the Washington papers yet either but a 55-14 loss to Oklahoma isn’t going to get a contract extension (unless you’re Charlie Weis, which clearly Willingham isn’t). And if you’re keeping track at home I said OU would more than cover the 21-point spread, and they did. Which proves I can both a.) state the obvious and b.) prove that I know what I’m doing some of the time.

Wisconsin nearly did get burned against Fresno State pulling out a three-point thriller 13-10. The spread was 2 points which absolutely amazes me that oddsmakers can get that close.

Finally, I questioned whether or not Clemson could get their season back on track against NC State. They surely did with a very uninspiring 27-9 victory. The Big Ten must be thankful that the ACC is laying down so much cover fire in the form of horrible football. Splendid diversionary tactics by two bad conferences.

You’re welcome.

1.) With the Buckeyes a heavy underdog on the road (~11.5 points), can Ohio State finally gain redemption for the last two national championship losses by defeating the Trojans? In order for that to happen, Ohio State must do two things- first, they must disrupt Mark Sanchez. With loads of speed in the front seven and an untested USC O-line/QB, this is the higher probability of the two requirements. Second, OSU must use play-calling to provide protection for the offensive line in passing situations. The pocket will not hold up against the USC pass rush for more than a second or two. Quick hits will be a necessity or the USC defense will dominate the Buckeyes.

2.) I’m setting the over/under on Terrelle Pryor snaps at 6. It will be interesting to see how many times and in what way TP is used by the Buckeyes on Saturday night.

3.) Will either Ohio State or USC get 300 yards of offense? I think it’s safe to say whichever team gets to 300 wins.

4.) Can South Carolina stun Georgia for a second year in a row. Amazingly (to me at least), the line is only 7 points so Vegas clearly expects a close game. After watching South Carolina lose at Vanderbilt a week ago, we say anything less than a 10-point win for Georgia should drop them in the polls.

5.) Which team has more pride- Michigan or Notre Dame. Pride is the only thing that’s on the line with these two teams that have underperformed vs. expectations thus far, vastly so in Notre Dame’s case. I like Michigan to win solely based on the performance of their defense. They should be able to control the game in what will be a low-scoring affair.

6.) Is this the game that gets Syracuse Head Coach Greg Robinson fired? With an 0-2 start and a good-looking Penn State coming into town, a home blowout loss might be the final blow for Coach Robinson.

7.) Can Rick Neuheisel and the UCLA Bruins draw on the momentum from their game one win over Tennessee and beat a quality BYU team on the road? BYU is favored by 8.

8.) Is this the game that gets Washington Huskies Coach Ty Willingham fired? It’s a little unfair here for Ty, with Washington again having one of the toughest schedules in the country. Two losses to start the season, both to ranked opponents and in comes the Oklahoma Sooners. Washington has proven that their defense simply can’t be relied upon so this one could out of hand quickly. OU is favored by 21 and they’ll win by at least that much.

9.) Will Wisconsin get burned while playing with fire (playing on the road against a frisky Fresno State squad)? Wisconsin is favored by 2.

10.) Can Clemson get their “championship season turned recovery effort” back on track. A pissed off and well below average NC State limps into town to try and get Tommy Bowden fired. The same NC State team mind you that got blown out by South Carolina and squeaked by William & Mary by 10 points. This will certainly tell us whether or not Bowden has lost his team (and if he has, he’ll probably be fired, or at least be threatened as such). Gotta love the ACC.

You’re welcome.

The Red Renee staff is on location for the Ohio State-USC game Saturday night. We’ll have a report to file tonight but we can give you the early report- the USC fan base and radio hosts are verrrry confident. Anything other than a blowout win will be a disappointment for Trojan fan.

This dude has the worst fake British accent in the history of television and film. It’s so utterly fantastic in its’ awfulness I simply can’t not watch.

You’re welcome.

There’s a troubling stat for Ohio State Buckeye fans. More troubling than the health of tailback Beanie Wells, more troubling than all the missed tackles by the OSU defense last week, and more troubling than the way QB Todd Boeckman locks in on receivers and telegraphs his throws. The troubling stat relates to the lack of productivity by the OSU offense when in scoring position.

We looked at the teams in the AP top ten and compared the mix of touchdowns and field goal attempts (FG success is slightly irrelevant for this exercise) as a mix of the total number of times “in scoring position”. The results are startling and down right scary for Ohio State fans. Through two games, Ohio State has had 14 scoring opportunities- 6 have been touchdowns and 8 have been field goal attempts. If you break that fraction down into a ratio that equates to 3 touchdowns for every 4 field goal attempts.

Compare that to Oklahoma who has a ratio of 15 touchdowns to 1 field goal attempt, or Georgia with 7.5 touchdowns to 1 field goal or USC with 7 TD’s to one field goal.

Looking at the entire top ten, Ohio State has by far the least impressive “productivity ratio”. There are only two teams within range of their futility- Auburn at 1 TD to 1 field goal, and LSU at 2.5 TD’s to 1 field goal.

Call it conservative offensive scheming, failure to execute, bad luck, or any number of excuses but the bottom line for Buckeye nation is that ratio must improve this weekend against Ohio State. One sure way to dial up a loss against USC is to trade touchdowns for field goals.

You’re welcome.

Checking in on the Bottom Ten after week 2. First the worst offenses:

Not too much of interest on the offensive side, except that both the PAC-10 and the ACC both have two teams in that group. Michigan’s inclusion for the second week in a row also merits mention.

Here are the ten worst defenses:

Two Pac-10 teams on the worst defense list as well, including Washington who has the Oklahoma Sooners coming into town this weekend. Snap.

You’re welcome.

This is hilarious, in a very odd and peculiar way.

You’re welcome.